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Witnessed
Gnarwolf, 2007-12-13
11/01/08 || Global Domination
This review was written by ex-staffer/cocksmoker Jotun.
Venue: Awful Arthur’s, Blacksburg.
Where: Virginia.
When: December 13th, 2007.
Country: America.
Note: There were other bands playing, but they were all a bunch of hippie, reggae, jam crap that I’d rather have a urethral swab than standing through.
I can guarantee there is a greater probability of finding Jesus in your pubes than managing to come across this band, let alone having the pleasure of seeing them live. With other party-thrash bands like Municipal Waste and F.K.Ü. barely being or just becoming noticed, it’s even harder for class-act, beer-guzzling, head-banging, thrash-attacking bands like Gnarwolf to hit the public eye.
The venue, to put it lightly, absolutely sucked. The degree of suck had nothing to do with the actual environment (even though a seafood restaurant is an odd place for a thrash show) since the sound was half decent. Standing front row I was eagerly awaiting some severe “Collateral Slammage”. Like a child learning that Santa is actually a pedophile, I was horribly disappointed to see nothing but frat boys and their girlfriends holding their $10 rum and cokes, occasionally banging their heads. There would be no drunken, thrash-induced moshing tonight my metal friends.
Crossed up arms, that shit aint right
Circle of Judgement in full effect tonight
Circle of Judgement that shit aint cool
You’re not a hot shot, and you look like a fool
Don’t be afraid to have a good time
Wasting all of you life trying to look like a tough guy
At the end of the day, when all is said and done
It’s not who looks coolest, but who had the most fun
Couldn’t have said it better myself.
The unfortunate lack of moshitude did not hold the Gnarwolf from devouring the crowd. Plenty of metal-thrashing-mad headbanging was to be had as the Gnar produced one of the best sounds I’ve heard from these guys. Jake was ripping through the guitar with wicked shreds, Jon’s bass was pounding through the madness, Sterling was slamming through the drums as if he was wielding Mjolnir, and Buskey’s voice was ravenous. Personal favorites of mine, “When the Gnar Attacks” and “Circle of Judgement”, were played along with a thrashingly killer new song “Til Death Do Us Party”. Though the set was unfortunately short to make way for bands that would make Jerry Garcia roll over in his grave, the thrashing was intense, ripping, and most of all, fun. When the Gnar attacks, enemies are crushed, driven before you, and the lamentation of women is heard. Now, CHUG SOME FUCKING BEERS!
8.5 baby seals sacrificed in the name of partying out of 10.
